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Fort William Awards

Winners of a Merit Award were presented with their prizes of a sweet!

The Tweedledum & Tweedledee Award for the couple who stayed together and drank together the whole weekend …
Steve Cowlin & Markus Killer

The Pub Quiz Award for the person who will now be asked on any pub quiz team …
Adam Payn

The Fish School Award for the group who took greatest advantage of the free pool …
The Maher Family – Chris, Carol, Nicky & David

The Celebrated Wee McG Award because anyone who puts that look on Mike’s face deserved an award …
Richard Lovett

The Bravery Award for sharing a room with Tweedledum and Tweedledee …
Toby Andrews

The Lastminute.com Award for services to the band at the last minute – doing a great job standing in on Flugel …
Veronica Peerman

The Independence Award for breaking away from the band and doing what they wanted to do … including ordering breakfast from room service!
Mike Weiler & Hilary

The Long Suffering Service Award for coping with the band and one member in particular for so long …
Janet Clements

The Best Dressed Player Award for turning up to both concerts in his shorts after forgetting his black trousers …
Paul Smith

Best Supporting Artistes Award for guesting so well with CPB …
Guy, Paul & Sandra

Busman’s Holiday Award for driving us around so well!
Ray & Pappy

Tourist Attraction Award for actually getting us some audience during the Sunday concert whilst playing her solo Demelza …
Rachel Bleach

The Mr. Smooth Award because we Can’t Take Our Eyes Off him, when he’s Killing Us Softly With His Song, he’s Mr. Smooth himself …
Mike Burton

The Jewish Mother-in-Law Award for organising everyone …
Clare Lipscombe

The Rose between Three Thorns Award for giving the bass section a feminine side …
Adrienne Edmonds

The Best One-Liner Award when making sure the very drunk, very persistent, very short and very beardy Scot DIDN’T get a dance with her after he threatened to spit in her pint …
Maggie Stallybrass

The Perfectionists Award for those who kept their bad behaviour well concealed and so couldn’t be named and shamed …
Stan, Joe, Lisa, Sue, Anne Burton & Ron

Distinction Awards – Prizes presented as specified

Barrs Award – Presented on behalf of Barrs for doubling their annual profits in one weekend (NB, Barrs are the makers of Irn-Bru …!)
Anne Taylor – presented with a can of Irn-Bru

Entertainment Award – Presented to the Band Entertainer on the condition he practiced hard for the sing-a-long next year …
Basil Preuveneers – presented with a Sing-a-long Pub Karaoke Tape

Services to the Hotel Industry Award – Presented to the person who saved the hotel and its guests from Anne’s karaoke the previous night. Also presented in thanks for all the hard work put in over the weekend …
Mike Gray – presented with a few bottles of Malt Whiskey (actually we were feeling stingy and presented him with a postcard of a few bottles of Malt Whiskey, but it’s the thought that counts!)

The Non-Conformist Award – Presented to the couple who preferred to hike up a bl**dy mountain instead of going to a distillery and sampling free whiskey – most un-brass band-like behaviour …
Nigel Waites and Janine – presented with a Mars Bar each to reboot their energy supplies

The McHangover Award – A very close run contest. Markus Killer came a close second for his hangover on Saturday morning, but the award was presented to the player whose hangover was not actually a hangover, but was in fact caused by consuming insect repellent, or a virus, we’re still not sure …
James Gordon – presented with a Big Mac to help with the post-hangover munchies

Disco Diva Award – Another close call. Runner up Adam Payn needs a mention for his efforts at the Ceilidh on Saturday night, but the winner deserved the award for actually getting up to dance with the very drunk, very persistent, very short and very beardy Scot and living to tell the tale …
Annette – presented with a Disco Diva Doll

Gratitude Award – presented to someone who the whole party were enormously grateful to for organising such a fantastic trip to Scotland, and generally being a ‘Good Egg’ … in Scotland …
Roger Clements – presented with a Scotch Egg (Good Egg, Scotland, Scotch Egg … ?!!)


Alcoholic of the Trip Award – The final award was the closest of the whole ceremony. Steve Cowlin had been the clear leader for much of the weekend, drinking far more than everyone else. However, on the final night he was heard to tell the eventual winner “You don’t need any more alcohol”, and so had to be presented with the Wooden Spoon. And the outright winner, solely due to his drinking on the last night of the trip …
Marcus Killer – presented with an inflatable Guinness glass (which he insisted on cuddling to help with the hangover all the way home …!)

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